I hired a “friend” (yes, air quotes) to do my kitchen cabinets a few years ago. I overpaid for the entire project because it was helping a friend that needed the money. Unfortunately, I got screwed toward the end of the job. I could have sued. It was so bad, I could have pressed criminal charges. As my significant other will attest, I still harbor anger over this situation. Yes, forgiveness would help me out some, but when it comes to getting ripped off by someone you thought was your friend, its easier said than done.
There are entire books written on “How To Forgive”, and these books make forgiveness seem like some sort of science. Just follow the charts and checklists, and you’ll be healed. But it’s not a science and I’ve never heard a satisfactory explanation as to what happens inside of me when I forgive. When people say “I need you to forgive ME”, they’re just looking to gain the outward effects of forgiveness. Let’s say a wife cheats on her husband–and consequently gets the angry cold shoulder forever–the wife’s hope of forgiveness is just that her husband will bring back the love and warmth he once had for his wife.
I get it. The world would be a better place if we all forgave each other–but how do you do that? Most importantly, what happens on the inside?
I don’t know.
I didn’t press charges on the contractor “friend” that did my kitchen. Our real life example case for today involved a similar situation where charges were pressed over a kitchen deal gone bad. In Leggett v. State, a homeowner hired a carpenter Carl Leggett to remodel her kitchen. 2018 Fla.App.LEXIS 701 (Fla. 3d DCA 2018). The homeowner gave Leggett a $2,250 check as a deposit to start the work, and they had an agreement that this work was to be completed within 2 weeks. So far, so good, right? Continue Reading